Saturday, June 12, 2010

Blurgh!

Yesterday was my first weekend alone in quite a few weeks, and I wanted to make sure I at least tried to get out in the city and do something fun. Even though I'm technically living here, as stated on my lease, I am still kind of operating in tourist mode; there are so many things I haven't seen, and the city doesn't feel familiar yet. So, I decided to have a campy tourist day (CTD, abbreviations, my one true love). First stop: Rockefeller Center.

Despite avidly watching 30 Rock for the past four seasons, I still didn't really know what Rockefeller Center even was. A brief search online showed it to be a weird amalgamation of high-end chain retailers and bourgeoise fast food, but there had to be more to it; tourists wouldn't flock from all corners of the world just to go to the mall, right? If I was going to have a CTD, I had to adopt the tourist mentality: no holds barred (is that the correct idiom?) Tourists are obvious, over-the-top, and do everything with gusto, which are great qualities in my opinion. I had to do something equally enthusiastic.

Inspiration struck from my latest blogging obsession, pop culture immersion blogs, where people follow the advice that media outlets give them to a tee. My favorites so far have been 30 Days of GOOP and The Seventeen Magazine Project, both of which are hilarious, spot-on, and a delightful intersection of my favorite things: pop culture, blogs, and novelties. Anyways, I decided to give it a shot with my own adaptation of a character:



"Those shoes are definitely bi-curious."

Liz Lemon, played by Tina Fey. If someone told me I would grow up to Tina Fey, I would not be able to feign displeasure. According to many friends and family members, Liz Lemon is my doppleganger in both body, spirit, and awkwardness; I take this as a compliment, even though Lemon is infamous for her high intake of simple starches and ability to perform stripteases in flannel pajamas and a retainer (Tina Fey stated in an interview that Liz Lemon is based on herself in the earlier stages of her career; Fey was also known throughout college as being notoriously awful at detecting the sexual orientation of others, a quality I too share, and which has made me the butt of many a joke, thanks suitemates) . So, I donned my Lemoniest and hopped on the F Train!

Rockefeller was disappointing, because it really was just a giant mall, but with a lot more people. The NBC store was pretty cool. It simply does not get better than a MILF Island t-shirt:


I was honestly more entertained by the recycle-picker-uppers (I live on the same block as a can/bottle center, so there are always people milling about picking up discarded goods and making noise either a) at 7 AM or b) in my general direction) catcalling me. HAHA you have a Liz Lemon fetish.

Other than that, there wasn't much to see, unless you wanted to shell out quite a bit of money to go to the top of the observation deck. I kind of ambled around, hoping someone would mistake me for Tina Fey and let me in to NBC Studios, but no dice. Bored, I headed to MoMA for Free Fridays, hoping to be entertained by modern art and blah blah blah whatever.

As soon as I walked inside, I remembered that I am not good at art. It's not that I think it's stupid, or that I don't like it, but I just can't understand it. I stare it like it's an acid-base equation that needs to be solved, and when I can't figure it out I get frustrated and just kind of slink away. So, after a few minutes spent with Picassos and some photographer whose name escapes me and OH MY GOD so many little children, I headed back to Brooklyn. Lame, I know, but it was a hopeless cause. Instead, I hunkered down with David Foster Wallace's Oblivion, and had a very relaxing night with a good book and an even better cup of tea.

Today has been equally quiet. I spent some time in the Botanical Gardens, but I've found that when I'm left to my own devices, my attention span is even shorter than usual, so I left after only a little while. One can only look at plants by oneself for so long. Also, so many children. Now I'm just killing some time before heading to the library for the We Won't Be Shushed 24-Hour-Read-a-thon; to raise money and awareness in the face of budget cuts, the Brooklyn Public Library is staying open from 5 PM Saturday to 5 PM Sunday and holding continuous readings throughout the night. This evening, I'll be roving around collecting signatures on petitions, and hanging out at a postcarding table. It sounds (really, really) dorky, but I missed the service and community involvement that APO offered/mandated, and even though I've only been here for a month, it feels good to be able to be a part, at least a little bit, of this neighborhood. Volunteering at a Read-a-Thon in Brooklyn to save a library is one of the most stereotypical SHaack events around, so I decided to cap the night off with something more predictable: ice cream at Blue Marble, a local ice cream place that serves organic products from upstate New York, and, again, a hot date with David Foster Wallace BOW CHICKA WOW WOW

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